We Have A Technical

It is now official. Tubby Smith hates me.

There can be no other reason for what happened this past weekend in Atlanta, formerly known as "Cat"-lanta. I guess it is not enough that Coach Smith has gone out of his way to ruin my weekends here in Lexington, now he is trying to ruin my weekend vacation.

I believe that the only reason Keith Bogans is still playing all of these minutes is just to spite me.

That is really the only logical answer for some of his moves this past season.

So, Coach Smith, I am sorry. I am not really sure what I did, perhaps bad-mouthing Saul last year, or it could be that I referred to your wife as Tub-ette (but not in a pejorative way), whatever it was, I am sorry.

In my defense, the Tub-ette name? I did not come up with that.

Hopefully, this will solve all of the problems going on and Tubby Smith will shift his focus from spiting me, to the NCAA Tournament.

So, this was going to be a column about me and No Chance heading down South to get the first taste of March Madness as we cheered the Cats on to the SEC Tournament Title. That idea didn't even last until midnight.

We were a little late to the game, due to some construction problems, which is now reason #173 on the list of: "Things I Hate About Tennessee." The weekend was not a total loss. I saw some friends, had some drinks, and was given a walking tour of downtown Atlanta by a very friendly gentleman, who I tipped handsomely.

Unfortunately, I also had to endure standing around Lenox Mall for awhile waiting on No Chance to pick out a belt. Since the stories I have from the past weekend have little or nothing to do with sports, and this is a sports column, we will now turn our attention back to the NCAA Tournament.

The picks I am going to give here are for entertainment purposes only and are not to be used for illegal gambling purposes, especially if you want to win any money.

THE SOUTH: This is where the team everyone loves to hate resides, Duke. I really do not see a lot of upsets in this bracket. Duke should have no problem getting to the Sweet 16. Indiana should finally win a first round game, but they will not last the weekend because USC will send them packing. In the lower bracket, I still think the seeds will hold, with the SEC's own Alabama squaring off against the Pitt Panthers. The South Regional Finals will take place here in Rupp Arena, so we will all have an opportunity to go and boo Duke, and if someone sees Duke reserve Reggie Love out at a fraternity party at UK, well, I think you know what to do.

THE WEST: This is supposed to be the toughest bracket, but I am not really sure. There are a lot of really good teams, but I do not think any great teams. Cincinnati always seems to flame out and I am not sold on Oklahoma. Still, I think Ohio State will meet Cincy in the round of 16, with Oklahoma losing out to Xavier and going on to face the Arizona/Gonzaga winner. That is the hardest game to pick. I believe the winner of that game will go on to the Final Four, but since I am only picking the Sweet 16 at this point, I think I will go with the Zags and Dan Dickau going on to face Xavier.

THE EAST: This is UK's bracket, but I do not think they will be around long enough to matter. That is really hard to say, but I have lost a lot of confidence in this team. I hope I am wrong, but at least I will pick them to win their first game. Maryland will roll to the Regional Finals, taking care of Wisconsin along the way. Bob Knight and the Texas Tech Red Raiders will lose to Southern Illinois and Michigan State will upset the UConn Huskies. Michigan State will face off with Georgia, who I think will be well rested and ready to play. Sorry UK, I really hope I am wrong.

THE MIDWEST: I really want to pick Western Kentucky to beat Kansas, but I am going with my head and not my heart. Kansas will go on to face Florida in the Sweet 16, in what will be a very exciting, high scoring game. Mississippi State is hot and will remain hot, while Pepperdine will be the Cinderella of this bracket, knocking out #2 seed Oregon, who is very overrated.

So, my Sweet 16 picks for the South are: Duke, USC, Pitt and Bama, no big upsets. The West will have Cincinnati, Ohio State, Gonzaga, and Xavier, and it is hard to call Gonzaga an upset. The East will have Maryland, Marquette, Georgia, and Michigan State. Michigan State is the only Big 10 team worth anything. The Midwest will feature Kansas, Florida, Mississippi State, and Pepperdine. So, there you go. If you want to send me your picks, you may be eligble to win a prize.

Beat my picks and I will give you naked pictures of Rhonda Reeves. Okay, not really, she would kill me if I handed those out.

The games start Thursday, so don't cheat, and email me your predictions at You will win something.

Maybe a dinner with No Chance who knows?