A few years ago a woman remarked that I speak in absolutes. At the time I had no idea what she meant. She went on to explain that I had a tendency to make sweeping statements, such as "this is perfect," or "this is awful." When she said it, I thought it a rather bold thing to say and truth be told, it hurt my feelings in some vague way. About the fourth time I said, "George Bush is a monster," I started to see her point.

However, I said to her, and I still maintain, that my way of speaking can be interesting and even rather charming. Everyone knows where he or she stands and I tend to sound quite enthusiastic. I have also realized that I have been speaking in absolutes for a long time and that my powers can be used for evil or good.

As I drove over the bridge and approached the house Ted and Sandra Mims built behind their residence on Tates Creek Road (it's just past Alumni though one would swear he had landed in Woodford County somewhere near the Kentucky River.), I thought "Nice house." My first words as Ted opened the front door were, "This is fabulous." The front porch overlooks a small spring-fed pond, which Ted says never dries up regardless of rainfall, and a sycamore-lined meandering brook. While the front doors are clearly marked, French doors also allow entry from the porch to the library or dining room.

Marble floors lead from the entry hall to what Sandra calls the "Grand Room" (as opposed to the great room).

Two stories of windows look out over a brick patio and the back of the 1.1-acre lot. Sandra says that they sited the house so that if a buyer chooses to build a pool there is room and the house could be oriented toward it. (They also included two exterior doors in the master suite for this reason.) A large and elegant fireplace begs sparkling conversation to gather around it or dozens of stocking to be hung upon it.

The merely Great Room provides a cozy (but not small) space adjoining the kitchen for relaxing or chatting with the cook. The state-of-the-art kitchen has it all including the standards such as a Thermador six-burner gas range with a griddle, a commercial hood (which has been faux-painted to match the tile of the backsplash), convection double ovens, maple cabinetry and granite countertops as well as the hostess-with-the-mostest fantasy appliances like the separate bar refrigerator and ice maker and the temperature controlled wine storage unit.

A breakfast nook adjoining the kitchen leads to a covered porch with skylights and a fan. I imagine that this may be the finest place in Kentucky to pass the time with a book as a storm passes.

The large master suite allows plenty of space for a large bed as well as a sitting area. The luxurious master bath also provides plenty of room for two people with its double vanity and three closets. After the storm passes a person might be a little chilly. She would have to decide between the bathroom's Jacuzzi and a steam shower to warm herself.

As we were wrapping up, I said to Sandra, "This is really wonderful."

Ted said, "You know, I used to have a filly named Life with Lissa. If you ask me, that would not be so bad."

Argghh. I though that stupid horse had run through a fence or something. I never dreamed that it made it out into the real world. When I was about 17 or 18 my father decided to name horses after his children. I am not going to lie to you - I was mean, mean, mean when I was 17 but I always thought it seemed unkind to name the horse Life with Lissa, as if I not only had a bad attitude, but was too dense to catch the implication that life with me was somewhat hellish.

In that moment, as I stood in the Mims' kitchen, I realized that 1. The very thing (let's just go ahead and call it speaking in absolutes) that made me so hideous as an angry teen (I was prone to say things like, "Don't talk to me. I don't like you.") makes me somewhat likable today. And 2. That maybe my father just meant that life with me was interesting, not necessarily awful.


2665 Tates Creek Road

$1.1 million

5074 square feet

3-car garage

1.1 acres

5 bedrooms

4 full and 2 half baths

Contact Sandra Mims 621-9661

If you have a unique or interesting house for sale contact Lissa Sims at lsims@aceweekly.com.