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n Austin each Spring around SXSW time, we Austinites

all start praying for some real hand of God-style weath-

er. Nothing helps stem the tide of the pending transien-

cy of wide-eyed bandguy tourists like the clouds opening

up and poisonous toads and blue-hot branding

irons pouring forth. Hasn’t happened

yet but still we hope. I’ve penned

a brief “insiders’guide" to

Austin for the coming flood of

SXSW attendees. Kick back

with an ice-cold bottle of

Pearl beer and let me break it

down for you.

The Holy Trinity has a lot

of meaning to a lot of people.

Chowhounds in Austin

have a dif-

ferent per-

spec-

tive on this delicate topic. Our trinity lacks religious connota-

tions but is equally affirming to the soul.

It is: Breakfast Tacos, Chicken Fried Steak and Chips and

Hot Sauce [Salsa].

Some thoughts.

Breakfast Tacos: I’ve trekked far and wide across our fair

city, steely-eyed with determination to get to the bottom of

this matter, El Sol Y La Luna [1224 S.Congress Ave] emerged

victorious with a glorious, hefty Bacon Egg and Cheese num-

ber on a grilled corn tortilla…no need to peek back in the

kitchen, I knew a grandmother was patiently plying her trade,

dispensing food as love. On my first pilgrimage to SXSW back

in the early 90s I was led to Tamale House [5003 Airport Blvd]

a ramshackle Tex-Mex joint by the railroad tracks [ahh rail-

road tracks…food is always better eaten near railroad tracks]

65 cents later I was on the business end of a Bacon Egg and

Cheese taco with memorably great salsa and wonderfully

run-down atmosphere. Fifteen years later the only thing

that’s changed is the price [90 cents now]. This is

Austin dining at its finest and is the FIRST place I take

out of towners.

Chips and Hot Sauce [Salsa]. The official

snack food of the state of

T exas.

The house passed a bill just in case a dispute pops up. When

you sit down in a Mexican restaurant a waitress will instant-

ly place them in front of you. Ninety nine percent of local

joints do not charge a penny for this delicious treat.

Winnowing down my list was right at impossible [there are

roughly 200 Mexican restaurants in Austin, no joke]. Los

Altos [3301 N. Interstate 35] has two great ones, a red spiked

with cilantro and a green with a righteous, spicy kick. Relax

to the great jukebox and watch the world flow north to Waco.

La Mexicana [1924 S.1st St], stroll past the dazzling display of

Mexican pastries and have a seat on the cafe side. A waitress

will bring you a good red salsa, ignore it and approach the

communal salsa bar and grab a bowl of the downright evil

looking salsa on the right…it’s deep burnt red with millions

of tiny seeds, hearken to its siren song and post up near a

bathroom 4-5 hours later. It’s that good.

Chicken Fried Steak: In the Deep South we call it Country

Fried Steak and wash it down with ice cold Sweet Tea [this is

but one hallmark factor that contributes to Texas not being The

South despite frequent, noisy cries from the

locals to the contrary]. Dozens of

local joints clamor

An Austin chef’s guide for SXSW-ers

By RL Reeves Jr.

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theirs is the finest with most of a quality ranging upwards

towards edible. R.O’s Outpost [22112 Hwy. 71 W.]is downright

good. Known more for their barbecue [very fine by the way]this

tiny roadhouse also offers DEEP FRIED CORN ON THE COB,

the mere presence of which on a local menu has offered a sooth-

ing balm to my soul during trying times [repeat the phrase

mantra-like and see if it works for you too]. R.O.’s also has a pie

lady worth her weight in gold, so save a little room.

Barbecue is always better if you have to drive to get it. In

Austin we have good barbecue right near downtown [Sams,

House Park, Artz Ribhouse]but we are surrounded by great

barbecue in the hinterlands [Crosstown in Elgin, Mueller’s in

Taylor, Cooper ’s in Llano] as usual there’s one hulking beast

that puts the others to shame. Blacks Barbecue [208 N.Main

St] in Lockhart has been smoking steers and grinding hogs

into sausage for right at 75 years. The brisket is succulent,

fatty and crispy all at once. The sausage is made in-house and

spiked with plenty coarse, black pepper and the best part. It’s

tied off between links with FILTHY TWINE! Hell Yeah. I’ve

dragged a few carloads of folks out there over the years and

their expression is priceless. Ignore the desultory, non-meat

side dishes as you shuffle through the cafeteria-style line and

point yourself toward the meat man with gleaming blades at

the ready. Got any room left. Stop by Smittys [208 S.

Commerce St.] a block or so away and sample more very deli-

cious barbecue with its own righteous pedigree.

We’ll get back to food in a minute, but let’s talk about beer.

Ice cold and dirt cheap is how we like it in these parts with no

exceptions allowed. We like to drink our beer in peace year round

but during SXSW that can be a tricky proposition. Bars within a

20 block radius of downtown are swarmed over by chain-wallet-

ed ruffians and girls in threadbare Journey t-shirts, the utterly

played out phrase “hipster" comes to mind. Venture just a bit out

of downtown however and you can order a cold one and share

some interesting conversation with a local. Buddy’s Place [8619

Burnet Rd.] has been there for eons, before that it was Barbara’s

and it too was there for eons. Enjoy the low ceilings, David Allan

Coe on the jukebox and a rough, gravel parking lot. Go in the late

afternoon as the sun is breaking just right through the propped

open door and discover why O Henry called Austin the City of

the Violet Crown. T.C.’s Lounge [1413 Webberville Rd] is your

spot for a Mississippi juke-joint style hang. The Blue Flame for

the first few decades of its existence, it hasn’t changed much since

it became T.C.’s 30 or so years ago. Bad-ass Fried Catfish, ice cold

beer and saucy barmaids round out the mix. The regulars avoid

the place like the plague on Mondays as the Oxford shirt crowd

has decided that’s “their night." “Hey, their money’s green too,

honey" explained one bartender.

A brief interlude to ponder an Austin-fashion peccadillo.

Men wanting to fit in here “Austin-style" should consider the fol-

lowing. Borrow your sister’s flipflops. You know, the ones she

got at Walgreen’s to wear to the beach or pool. Adult males here

stroll about exploring their feminine side on a daily basis. Make

sure your toe knuckles are covered with bristly black fur and/or

leathery pucks of discolored skin. Channel Fred Flintstone

and join the herd. Tethered by masculinity but still want to

come off Austin-y. Pepper your conversation with homi-

lies like “Boy when ol’ Waylon took the stage at Soap

Creek there wuddn’t no bartender what give a damn

‘bout what your smoke smelled like." Not going for old-

school country cat. How about bemoaning chowhound.

“Boy I shore do miss hunkering down over a 32 ounce T-

bone at ol Ray’s [Ray of Ray’s Steakhouse fame cut a broad

figure in our town’s dining scene for a few years]. A leg-

end at 6’5", 450 lbs., he was the kind of guy who bore lit-

tle resemblance to a homo sapien.

Years of rampant beef consump-

tion had morphed him into a sort

of giant, walking Porterhouse.

On the opposite end of the

spectrum: Do you move cowlike

through life eschewing the bounty of the

gourmand’s world for a more ascetic

approach. Are you a vegetarian. Austin has a

multitude of dining options for those paralyzed

by a desire for immortality. I’ve never darkened

their door but word from herbivore acquaintances

has it that Mother’s [4215 Duval St.] Mr. Natural [1901 E.

Cesar Chavez St.] and Nu Age Café [2425 Exposition

Blvd.] have plenty fescue and alfalfa oriented dishes for

those who prefer a flavor free existence. Vegetarians look-

ing to feast on the honeyed bounty of captive bees prosti-

tution are not welcome at Casa de Luz [1701 Toomey Rd.]

their rigidly vegan menu offers no such chicanery.

Honeybees are not hookers folks.

Austin Hall of Fame [Quick takes and

Don’t Misses]

Did you thrill as a child to the talented animatronic bears

at Showbiz Pizza. Their glaring lack of presence in the Austin

food scene is mitigated somewhat by a giant, animatronic LBJ

at the library bearing his name. Press a button on the display

and find out why Texas should never EVER be allowed to put

a man in the White House.

Does your lunch budget come to a grinding halt at $2.44.

Taqueria Arandas [all over town] got your back. That’s the

local chains ‘tariff on a tostada schmeared with lard-y refrieds

and towered up towards Heaven with lettuce, tomatoes,

white cheese, avocado, sour cream and your choice of 8 dif-

ferent Jalisco-style meats. Go for the Pierna de Puerco

[Roasted leg of pork].

By now every scenester in town with a Trail of Dead t-

shirt has an internal GPS pointing towards Casino el Camino

[517 E. 6th St.] when the need for a giant, char-grilled Black

Angus burger rears its head. But this is an insider ’s take

soooo…jump in your rental and head west to a little joint a

half hour outside of town called Poodies’ [22308 Hwy. 71 W.].

Belly up to the bar, heft an ice cold Pearl

Beer and order a Hatch Chile Bacon Jack

Burger, the cook will cut a hunk off a

stick of cow’s butter, throw it on the flat-

top and magic will happen. Willie,

Shaver, Leon Russell and

others have been

known to show up and play on the tiny stage.

Finally, the ultimate Austin trump card. My ace in the

hole. In the late ‘70s a retired Army airman and his Thai

wife bought a couple mobile homes in Garfield Texas,

jammed them into an L formation and Little Thailand [4315

Caldwell Lane] was born. The back trailer became a cozy,

dimly lighted lounge, the front trailer a restaurant. The only

thing missing from this Lynchian tableau is a chimp sitting

on the end of the bar smoking a cigarette going “try the Pad

Thai man, it’s stellar." The food. Having ardently pursued

Thai food across two continents I feel confident in declaring

it the finest I’ve come across. Try a wok seared Ribeye, Thai-

style. Your life will change.

In closing, come to Austin and sample her many charms.

If you’re fortunate she’ll let her hair down a little for

you…love her…leave her, but under no circumstances move

here. She’s full up. ¦

Russell Reeves Jr. is a chef and writer living in Austin, Texas.

Austin’s legendary South by Southwest music festival is March 14-

18. Register online at sxsw.com/register. Phone is 512.467.7979.

Did you thrill as a child to the talented animatronic bears at Showbiz Pizza.

Their glaring lack of presence in the Austin food scene is mitigated

somewhat by a giant, animatronic LBJ at the library bearing his name. Press

a button on the display and find out why Texas should never EVER be

allowed to put a man in the White House.

SXSW